My 2014 Predictions

happy-new-year-2014-wallpaper-hdWell hello there, 2014.  You’ve arrived just in the nick of time. You see, 2013 was getting to be a pest, and most of us didn’t want that around anymore. Glad you are here.

On to my predictions. I didn’t do predictions last year or the year before. It used to be a staple of mine.

They are kind of like the “prediction shows” Art Bell used to do. Not meant to be accurate, but to be fun. I do not make dark predictions generally, and try to avoid them unless it cannot be avoided.

My 10 predictions are:

1. No significant changes come after the 2014 midterm elections. Infighting amongst the “old guard” and “libertarian” wings of the Republican Party cancel out any gains the GOP could have made. I think we’ll see one more Independent senator and a couple of third party congressmen, however. Locally, Rick Scott wins four more years as Florida’s governor.

2. Terrorism hits China and Russia in the form of Al-Qaeda. Russia openly makes accusations against Saudi Arabia being behind it all, while China is much more guarded and makes no accusations.

3. The Sochi Olympics do not go well, with athletes boycotting the games due to ongoing terrorism leading up to the Games. Russia wins the Gold in men’s ice hockey over Canada in an ugly fight-filled game (much like a famous battle between them in 1987) that sparks an international protest. The Americans surprisingly do well at curling, taking a silver and a bronze medal in the women’s and men’s divisions, respectively.

4. Rush Limbaugh announces plans to retire in 2015, with plans to have six regional talk show hosts take his place in various parts of the country in Los Angeles, Seattle, Atlanta, Dallas, New York, and Chicago. This “regional wheel” sets up a paid podcast service so that conservative talk listeners can pay a small fee to listen to the other regional shows.

5. CNN announces in late 2014 that they will launch a reality show called “The Candidate” to find and sponsor and independent candidate for President in 2016.

6. Sports Predictions: Brazil wins the World Cup, Auburn’s Tigers win the national championship of college football, and the Kansas Jayhawks do likewise in college basketball. In the pros, the Seahawks surprise Denver to win the Super Bowl at the Meadowlands (played in surprisingly nice weather), while the Cleveland Indians beat the Pittsburgh Pirates in an all Midwestern World Series. The Miami Heat win another NBA title, while the Chicago Black Hawks beat back the Tampa Bay Lightning to win the Stanley Cup.

7. The biggest upset of the year takes place at the Daytona 500, with Danica Patrick winning the race, inspiring a flock of female auto racers to hit the sport by 2030.

8. The stock market finally grasps on to reality. After going to 18,500 in the spring, world tensions in the Middle East and Russia cause the markets to slump, falling back to 12,000 by the end of the year. Gold peaks at $1,700, with the price of gas hovering at $4 across most of the county before a fall back to $3.75 by the end of the year.

9. Kanye West is scheduled to perform live on HBO at a concert one night, but he comes out and doesn’t sing or say anything. The network cuts away after 15 minutes and puts a rerun on.

And finally:

10. The 16th season of Big Brother ends without a winner when the remaining five houseguests wind up brawling on a live show.


2 thoughts on “My 2014 Predictions”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.